The Shannara Chronicles - 'Changeling'

Magic tree hallucinogens: Because I'm worth it.

Amberlie enters the Ellcrys and faces a test of character which is passed when she stabs a vision lof Wil. Seriously, I don't see what the big deal is. Four episodes in and I want to stab Wil. The vision however implies that she is somehow and for some reason in love with Wil, and indeed more in love than she was with her now very stabbed and dead boyfriend whom she ran away to avoid stabbing (thanks helpful visions!) I honestly don't see the appeal, or any spark of chemistry.

Regardless of the progression of the oh-so important love triangle, the Ellcrys is happy and makes with the seed pod, also providing some more flashy visions which hint that Safehold and the Bloodfire are to be found beyond the Wilderun in the 'outer world' or some such; presumably it's very far away, like two or even three days travel. However, the quest does not set off yet, as there is still a demon infiltrator in the capital who could report on Amberlie's movements. This is Allanon's excuse anyway, although I have to wonder what good an infiltrator in the capital will do once Amberlie is anywhere else but in the capital. I guess with the Four Lands being so tiny and all people will just be looking out from the wall and watching where she's going.

Speaking of the smallness of the world, the Rovers sneak up outside Arborlon and send Eretria in to retrieve the Elfstones. As she is executing an unplanned heist on a heavily guarded fortress on high alert, without support or reconnaissance, she flawlessly infiltrates the palace, finds a cloak just lying around and locates Wil in, like, a minute.

A fool and his Elfstones are soon parted.

Elsewhere, the Changeling is caught standing around and shifting her eyes silver while mind-talking to the boss, but fortunately the elite elven guard respond to this obvious sign of nefarious no-goodness by standing there while she shanks him through the brainpan.

And now we're on the subject of relentless and unreasonable stupidity, after a promising opening of mistrust, one smooch from Eretria and Wil is totally sold that she's here because she wants to start a new life with him. They get naked, he falls asleep, and she 'steals his Elfstones', possibly not in that order.

Elsewhere, King Eventine is telling Prince Grumpus that he's wrong and he's a dumbass who doesn't understand the magical complexities of real life and that he's changed his plan to abdicate and Grumpus will never be king because he's not ready and not half the man his dead brother was. Seriously, he should just pass the kid a book called "Oedipal Rage for Fun and Profit" and have done with it.

These two are my OTP for the series, simply because it constitutes
a Bandon ship.

Bandon - remember him? Emo looking elf with visions - vibes on Catania (hey hey hey) and sees her being stabbed by Eretria. He warns her not to go running upstairs, which she does, but he follows and prevents her taking a knife for Amberlie from the Changeling, who has taken Eretria's form after the escaping Rover runs into the one person in the palace who could recognise her. Seriously; how sparsely populated is this world? Main characters apparently can't help but run into each other at every turn.

Eretria is captured and arrested for trying to assassinate Amberlie, which is fair, and everyone assumes she is the infiltrator, which is not (well, unless you assume that the world is small enough for her to run into Amberlie and Wil in the wilderness then nip back to Arborlon in less than a day to listen in to plans, then out again and... oh, wait; that's exactly what this world is like. Never mind.) Bandon tells Wil that Eretria was in his vision of Amerlie's potential death, and Allanon realises his is a seer. They get him to vibe on the dead Chosen and he fingers Amberlie for the perp, finally tipping Allanon off that they are dealing with a Changeling; a shapeshifter.

They set a trap using Eretria as a body double, which fails miserably as the Changeling has been masquerading as one of the guard, but Allanon busts out some lethal wrestling moves. Bandon and Allanon browbeat Amberlie into admitting that Eretria was in her tree visions, but that she didn't mention it because she didn't trust her (with the distinct subtext that her real reason is that we must have a love triangle, damnit!) Thus they set off, with Eretria in chains, but not the superhuman druid, because he wasn't in the vision, much like the cadre of escorts who nonetheless accompany them to meet potential guide Johnnie Went to the Wilderun One Time, presumably in order to get murdered by the Rovers who see them depart on their secret mission of secretness in a convoy in broad daylight.

It looks like Wil's got the worst kind of trouble... Girl trouble!

As they head out, Allanon and a full company of guards see to the proper disposal of the shapeshifter's corpse.

Yeah; I'm just fooling. What actually happens is that Allanon gives the guards a magic urn and they send one dude to light the body on fire. Incredibly, the demon gets up and shanks him. Morons.

And that's the other problem with this series, on top of the mandatory love triangle, the utter blandness of its hero - compared to Manu Bennett he has all the fluffy inadequacy of Year 1 on the island Oliver Queen - and the minuteness of the world. Everyone is so fucking stupid. Wil is the ur-moron, but Amberlie is a flouncing princess and 'tough survivor' Eretria, who explains that she has basically spent every night since she was eight hugging a knife to keep from being raped by her 'father's' goons, goes so swoony over Wil that when an opportunity for freedom comes along she'd rather razz Amberlie about how she got groiny with Wil than seize said opportunity. And as for the supporting cast...

Okay, I get that the elf police aren't really prepared for demons, but given the total lack of resistance to Eretria's infiltration and their pitiful attempts at operational security it's a wonder they haven't all been murdered by gnomes. I find myself increasingly a gnome sympathiser, since apparently the elves are snobby idiots and the humans people-owning child rapists.