Wednesday 6 January 2016

Doctor Who - 'The Husbands of River Song'

Poster (c) Stuart Manning
“I'm going to need a bigger flowchart.”

This review will contain some spoilers.

It's Christmas in the Stars, and the Doctor has a bigger problem than what to get for a comb-owning wookie. The worst criminal in the universe is intent on getting a head by stealing the TARDIS, and she's roped in a reluctant partner: The Doctor.

The Good
  • 'The Husbands of River Song' has a cracking script and hangs on the banter between Capaldi's Doctor and River Song, which sparkles.
  • The pacing is superb, and while there are elements where, as usual, the Doctor is shown up by River, the fact that he has the advantage of her makes for a nice reversal.
  • The Doctor's reaction to the TARDIS interior is delightful.
  • The arrangements for the final dinner were a lovely use of time travel conceits, even if it kind of felt like the Doctor was fast forwarding to River's death.
The Bad
  • The near-total lack of sympathy for Ramone and Nardole is... Well, okay; it's par for the course with minor Who characters, but I still have a problem with it.
  • Why would you ever have a cyborg body programmed to consider your organic components to be disposable? Who built this thing?
  • And what the fuck is up with future space liners being sumptuous recreations of the Earth's golden age of luxury travel? Does no-one else in all the universe have ideas anymore?
The Ugly
  • What the hell is up with River Song? I mean... she's basically evil, it would seem. She has a standing reservation at the genocide hotel and honestly it's never clear what her real intention with the diamond was (I'm assuming she knew that her 'buyers' were an evil death cult, so was it a death trap?) but Daleks are scared of her. She's a shameless karma Houdini and we're supposed to be all right with it because... the Doctor loves her? Because she loves the Doctor? Because she only kills bad people by the million? I am not okay with this. Not in Doctor Who.
Theorising
I'm assuming that the Doctor knew River was almost at her final destination, hence his desire to be sure that their last date could happen, rather than just wanting it over with.

Top Quotes
  • "So that's why we didn't share a bathroom!"
    And the 'nights of pleasure' he mentioned? Was that just anticipatory in some sense?
  • "Hello Sweetie."
  • "I'm an archaeologist from the future. I dug you up."
  • “Every night is the last night for something. Every Christmas is last Christmas.”
The Verdict
I still have a real problem with River Song, in particular that she just isn't a very good person, but we're apparently supposed to accept that because love. Mind you, we keep being told that the Doctor is an arsehole as well, so I guess in that sense they're very suited. Increasingly this series seems to want me to cry hooray for selfish people just because they have a certain panache and joie de vivre.

That aside, I did enjoy 'The Husbands of River Song' and even got a little teary for the end of an era, for the Doctor's sake if nothing else. I also liked that, as much as it's been spun out and despite that twenty-four year night, the show is finally giving us some sort of ending in which the Doctor is willing to let go.I really hope this is a point of character growth, rather than an aberration; I would hate to see the next companion's departure trigger another strop against the universe.

Score - 7/10

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